Pretty Good Week

I know, I know, it's been too long since I posted. Between going to a Women's Encounter and then coming home and trying to catch up, I just didn't take the time to sit down and post. So I'll do it today! It's been a pretty good week actually. I don't know if it's just a temporary thing, if my prayer this past weekend helped this much,or if the techniques I've been researching and implementing are finally making a difference. I'm going to say prayer is a big part and that God has been leading me to know how to help John.

We've had the least amount of meltdowns this week than we've ever had. Not that we haven't had any, but not nearly what we usually deal with. Tuesday afternoon was one period of time this week that didn't go so well...but I think I pinpointed the trigger that day. My husband got upset that day over his lunch hour and yelled (I have a wonderful husband, but he just had a moment, like we all can have sometimes). We've found that yelling does not work around John because he seems to be over-sensitive to sounds. So Tuesday afternoon was filled with meltdowns. I was proud of myself for staying as calm as I did and not yelling or losing my cool.

The other moment that got crazy was last evening. John didn't take a nap yesterday, so by 6:00, he was exhausted and needing sleep! But at that point, I couldn't let him go to sleep yet! I was in the middle of cooking supper, my husband had someone over he was talking to, and John and I were working on decorating a pumpkin he got from our local store. He was already tired, getting hungry (It was cooking as fast as it could), and then he got paint on his hands.....and it all exploded. John hates having dirty hands and when I didn't get them cleaned off as quickly as he wanted we were 0 to meltdown in 3 seconds. This meltdown continued until I got John a plate of food....but it was only a temporary break because after he was done eating, he kept the meltdown going and was upset about EVERYTHING!

It's crazy how our days revolve around meltdowns and what John can and can't handle. Even what we do outside the house revolves around what John can and can't handle. We've learned that we can't go eat at someone's house (especially if they have children around Johns age) because it can be too overwhelming for John and he acts out in ways that a 1 or 2 year old would act (hitting, biting, pinching, etc). This is because he has trouble verbalizing his needs and wants, but he also doesn't know how to act around kids his own age. He tries to be social, but like any Aspie, he is socially awkward and doesn't understand the boundaries he should follow. These will be things he learns over time and with lots of work.

We are working on getting him in to see someone that can give us our official diagnosis, but I'm finding out that it can be a 4-6 month wait to get an appointment. I've found some good resources on facebook and the internet and they have helped so much! I've been reading books, reading blogs, reading articles, and researching therapy techniques that are used to help with aspergers. We've decided that for the moment, we want to continue homeschooling John...and we're still praying about he future of his schooling. We want whats best for him, and at this moment, we don't see this in any public schools or in-home therapy that's in our area. Plus, since he's not fully potty-trained, they won't allow him into any preschools that are in our area.

Last night, I couldn't sleep, so I sat down and basically typed out what a school system would call an IEP. I'm not going to call it that...I'm just calling it "John's Goals". I've found he has trouble learning colors, numbers, shapes, and letters. I'm going to keep working on those things, plus work on what could be termed as OT (Occupational Therapy). It will include social skills, fine motor skills, and other issues that can be associated with Aspergers. Can you tell I've done a ton of research?

This has not been an easy journey and I don't think it will get any easier for awhile, but I'm grateful for the support of my husband and daughter. I know we can do this and that my son will be just fine. The thoughts and emotions I've had on this journey have been kind of crazy. When I first realized that we were probably looking at a life with aspergers, I cried...as if I was grieving. But then I realized I couldn't keep crying and went into protective "mother bear" mode.

Then, I went through a short while that all I could see in my son was "special needs". I've not gotten to where I see John as the son he's always been. Knowing what he might have doesn't change who he is, it just helps us to help him. God made him just the way he is and there's no need to try to change him, we just need to adjust how we go about things with him. It was almost like a grieving process to get to where I am with John today.

We haven't gotten much sleep this week, so I'm going to go take a bit of a nap to keep going for the rest of the day. That's something as well....Aspie's don't always get the amount of sleep that other children get and don't seem to need as much sleep either. But more about that another day. Hope you have a great day and a great weekend. Be back with you tomorrow with another post!